Fact

It has passed for a month... How do I feel now? Unanimously, better! But I am still afraid of facing her... Afraid of her innocent face, smile, everything... 3 weeks to go, back to where I should be. Few days ago, we had a little interaction through FB. I was very happy even though the fact is still the fact... Hope there will be a chance for me, just like what the theme song of my page trying to deliver! I am worrying of what should I do when my friends and I are hanging out including her?!?! It's impossible for me to act like "what's happening? oh! really?". Despite, it is still hardly for me to say "cngtraz!!!". Although that's what I should do, but it's too difficult and it hurts... Perhaps, I can just stay at home, accompany my family or hang out with my teammates and coach?!?! The truth is, it can be anyone, but, honestly... not her! Here comes another problem. What if her best friend and I plan to go somewhere else? She will definitely bring her together... OH gosh! What should I do in order to let me feel better in front of her???

BETTER

Today is the 10th day after the unfortunate incident. It was suffering and depressing! Suffered by the fact, the fact of losing something... Depressed by the thing I lost... Well, it's still a shinny day after the rain! The sun is still hanging brightly on the sky, the flowers are still showing their beauty to the world, the bees are still working as well as the ants. The world is still as wonderful as before, everything is still as fine as before. Today, I went to Taipei to meet with my Chinese teacher, Mr.Bong! We met in Cheng Ping bookstore of Shi Lin. I am so happy to have the chance to meet with him in Taiwan. It was a rare opportunity, and I made it! After that, we found a coffee shop and had a cup of coffee. Once again I was surprised by the price of the coffee and foods serve by the shop... So EXPENSIVE!!! Anyway, thanks for the coffee and cake from Mr.Bong. The coffee was very nice as well as the cheese cake^^ We had a wonderful talk in the shop! Bu3, my basketball team, panda, little panda and so so much more we have talked about... It will be better if Shao Yong was there, but he couldn't make it because he is having an exam tomorrow. All the best to him and "one road smooth wind" to Mr.Bong. I will visit you when I am back to Malaysia and get ang pau from you^^ Besides that, I will bring lots lots lots of people together... MLY, Michael Khai, Zi Yi, Zhi San... haha =D See you next year!!!

有如天气般冷

台湾已渐渐入冬……寒冷的天气搭配寒冷的心，简直是绝配！事情已过了大约一星期，冷却的心还是结着冰，可能很难溶成水，更别想能像以往般的沸腾。不知为什么，这已是我在台湾过的第二个冬，可是这次的冷却是打从心底的冷，而且冷得有点可怕。自从那天，每晚都在梦中度过，没有一晚的安宁。思路图也被打乱，精神快到达崩溃的阶段，心情是冷的！无论如何，在我觉得精疲力尽、心酸无奈的时候，还有朋友安慰。虽然起不了多大的作用，但至少有缓和我当下的心情。也有朋友在曾此时用这件事来作弄我，我只能无言地接受，因为不想给无为的回答。这几天都在听歌，希望能借此消愁。但过了这些日子，只是发觉在自欺欺人，没效。希望这心情不会持续到我回国，因为回国也意味着我要面对事实的时候了。已答应朋友会与他们出来聚一聚，想反悔也不行。很害怕面对面的情况！应该装热情？还是表露自己的心情？或把以往的笑容挂在脸上，装没事？现在只能用课业的挤压来压着我的心情，唯一的方法，应该也是最好的方法。